Sunday, Someday..

Good ‘ol daylight savings, we ‘fall back’ yet another hour to appease the time old tradition of having more working hours … yeah sure.

In my case that means absolutely nothing, dogs DO NOT understand time change and it’s time for mom to get her dead ass out of bed at 0545. (To be fair it’s 0645 to them and that is sleeping in) Thanks. Love ya. Get moving. They have a jam packed day of pooping, eating and sleeping to get to. Yes, in that order.

The day has begun! The morning routine of a dance party on the bed, the boys need to be the first ones out the bedroom door only to spin around at the top of the stairs to continue said dance party with their favorite human! Cara fell down the stairs. Did she just break out of a seizure before I woke up? Or sleep on her leg wrong and not awake yet? I don’t know. I’m thinking it was too early for her old legs to get working. She looked like a little kid riding on her bum down a flight of stairs. Makes it to the landing and tails just a wagging and like ‘WOOH! Did you guys just see that’ … time to go outside. Drop my phone down the stairs, case cracks, that’s why I have a case! Nothing catastrophic to the case but now it doesn’t fit right, add buy new case to the to do list…

Open the front door and twelve chickens come trucking from all different directions of the front yard. RESIDENCE AT THE 96 …. I AM NOT AWAKE YET! STAAAHHHP! (=Stop)

Get that coffee brewing! I find a good cup of coffee and a good bowl of cereal very satisfying on a Sunday morning that I plan to be extremely uneventful. Pour a bowl of brand new, fresh, Post (the expensive stuff!) cereal goodness and reach for the milk …. What milk? NO MILK! We just got power back from the last storm and haven’t been shopping yet. Total fail. Put the cereal back in the spiffy air tight container, acting like a little kid that dropped an ice cream cone. Make myself a bagel with peanut butter … WTH! We have no milk, I just went over this with the cereal, less than sixty seconds ago, remember?  goldfish much?

So, this happen. Half peanut butter and half cream cheese and FYI this is what Oak and Cara NOT begging for my breakfast looks like …

It’s not even 0800 yet. What the hell is going on with my Sunday?

—–

I try not to let anything go to waste. My chickens love pizza!  Who’s a good girl?! And whatever they don’t eat hoover I & II also known as Cara and Oakley and more than happy to be the benchwarmers on leftovers.

—–

Hello amazon, I love shopping on amazon! Too bad it does not agree with bank account. Buy myself a new cell phone case and *gasp* OMG! DOG SWEATER!  Instantly justify the need to purchase a dog sweater for the freezing, should be living in California with a stoner human, Oakley. And of course order it in blue because it’ll match his boots that he already has!  🙂
One thing leads to another and I’m talking to some friends online about dogs, dog clothing and dog costumes come up in conversation and my lack of creativity and/or desire to spend $50 on a dog costume … lead to …

I call this “undercover K9 unit” he did not enjoy this as much as I did!
“Does this make my nose look big?”
Oh, he is such a good sport!

—–

*Big brown bird come flying down from the sky swooping down towards the house from the backyard* OH, HELL NO! I knew there’d be no chance to shoot so I just ran outside, chickens are clueless, all twelve accounted for. Huh, maybe I’m crazy, maybe the bird saw the evil chipmunk that has been harassing me and snatched it? I don’t know.
Fast forward +/- five hours.
Let the dogs outside, not a chicken in sight, call them, no one comes. Shit! Com’er girls …. chick, chick, chick…nothing. Mother clucker! Put the dogs back in and go for a perimeter check. Five or six chickens under the detached shed, two chickens in the attached shed hiding under the house. That still leaves me four or so short. Grrr.
Let the dogs back out with me and walk around a bit more. *vehicle off in the distance* towards a camp road, undoubtable a truck, engine revving then slowing, god damn it, someone is jerking off and they don’t belong here. Noise gets closer. Black ford pickup, four wheeler and canoe in back, blue license plate. I scream at the top of my lungs, SLOW THE FUCK DOWN! He complies, hear the truck slowly leave the property, then screaming tires, revving engine out of the driveway. Asshole. Respect property owners you douche! It was either a clan of hunters from away or college kids checking out what them city slickers think is a no man’s land is, either way I hate them.
Go for another perimeter check to find my girls … see a big ol brown bird fly off who just so happen to have a perfect view of the detached shed waiting for dinner to surface.  I find three girls next to the attached shed, three in the attached shed and six under the detached shed. Yay twelve! And of course I move my truck, so they have a half way point between the shed and the coop to hide under and we (three dogs and crazy human) constantly go outside to deter any bird of prey action.
Fast forward again +/- 2 hours.
All twelve girls are in bed and safe.
Holey Taledo!

—–

Maybe someday, my Sunday can be calm, cool and collected ….
Ah, who am I kidding? I wouldn’t change a thing!
Well, expect for the bird that wants my chickens as a meal, or people from ‘away’ near my property … not a fan of that!

 P.S. the chipmunk is still visiting the porch and driving me crazy.

 

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